I am writing to you with itchy, swollen eyes in my hot house feeling utterly wrung out and a tad bit tender. I cried a lot yesterday. For the purpose of this newsletter, the why is not as important as the power of the sheer release of it all. What I appreciate about my tears yesterday was how much permission I gave them. It felt futile to swallow them back into my body. They were asking for a pathway out. If you are a student of mine you have probably heard me say:
if it’s coming up, it needs to come out.
And so I cried to myself and then in a voice note to a friend…and then later at Barnes and Noble at The Grove in LA when I saw they had my book. And then again at a solo matinee showing of Barbie. Annnnd then again when my husband came to pick me up. Oh and then one more time when my friend Ash who is visiting from Toronto came home from her day of training. As I relayed my situation and how I was feeling to my loved ones, I couldn’t help but notice that there was no self judgement present. It was pure release. It has been a while since I have had multiple cries in a day. The floodgates were open and with each tear I felt guided back home to myself. Ahhh…what a relief.
Speaking of floodgates, my DM’s have been flooded the past few days with people asking if I am doing a Full Moon Ceremony this week. Huh, I thought, the full moon..right. This might have something to do with the massive heart opening and outpour of emotion yesterday. It all started to click.
Today is a super moon, meaning the moon is closer (you may have already seen it, she BIG) thus making the energy even more palpable. Full moons are the illuminators. A full moon can shed light on what is already there and magnify for the purpose of release! Letting go is an essential part of the human experience. You see, rebirth is constant. Letting go can actually get us to where we want to go faster! It seems counterintuitive. It would seem like gripping the wheel, swallowing our tears and powering through would, but this my friends, is how accidents happen.
Yesterday, I figuratively pulled over the the side of the road and let me emotions surface. I knew that if it was coming up, it needed to come out. So I let it. Instead of staying “in control,” and ticking of my to do list, I went to a Barbie Matinee in the middle of the day. I walked around The Grove, a famous outdoor mall in LA, and just let my tears flow. Crying in public was something I learned when I lived in New York. In Canada, I was too polite to cry in the streets, but in NYC it’s practically an initiation. If you haven’t cried on the subway, you’re doing it wrong.
Anyways, I walked around and let life move me. Seeing my book in a store I used to frequent as a teen was so beautiful that I let myself cry in the “Self Help/ Yoga aisle.” Watching Barbie and seeing women and girls of all ages fill the theatre to watch a movie about girhood made me cry and so on. I cried for it all. I just kept my heart open and let it be.
And you know what? I feel better. Yes, a touch tender and wrung out but I feel like myself. I moved a lot of old energy with my tears and I feel clear today. This is the gift of the amplifying powers of the moon. We feel to heal. So I said, fuck it, let’s do the Full Moon ceremony! I have got things to say, practices to teach and a raw heart to give (my favorite place to teach from.)
If you want to come, or use the recording, you can sign up here.
This full moon is in Aquarius. It is asking us to loving let go what is heavy. It is as if to place the burden down gently. And to thank it. And then to walk away. It is asking us to recognize what no longer resonates with our being. It is saying, “hey, I know you used to believe this about yourself, but you are outgrowing it.” It is saying LET IT OPEN, LET IT OUT, LET IT GO.
So let’s work with it, together. 60 mins of meditation, nervous system regulating breathwork, and curated journal prompts to get clear. Let’s burn off the dross. Let’s wipe away the residue. Let’s see life with the eyes of the heart.
Tomorrow at 5pm PST on zoom or with the recording anytime you like. We can work with this energy allll week!
See you there,
Ally xo